Learn How To Save A Marriage When Only One Is Trying

how to save a marriage when only one is tryingEffective Ways On How To Save A Marriage When Only One Is Trying

If you are trying to save your marriage and your spouse is no longer interested, then my heart goes out to you. You know you need some help because you are getting frustrated of the whole situation.

  • You have tried to get help but your spouse is being unsupportive and it is holding you back.
  • You’ve made requests to visit a counselor together or attend marriage therapy classes but all your efforts have been in vain because of constant rejection by your spouse.
  • Your spouse has said some hurtful words and you just want to make things right.
  • Sleepless nights and restless days have become a norm for you because you are desperately thinking of what is going on.
  • You feel alone when your spouse is near and it even makes it hard to breathe.
  • Sometimes you enjoy the loneliness when your spouse is away because you can fall apart and not have your spouse know about it. Are you wondering why you feel this way?
  • It is because you are the only one holding on to the marriage.
  • Your world is falling apart and you cringe at the thoughts of your spouse leaving you and being happy with someone else.
  • You are torn between fighting for your spouse to stay and giving up.

You need to learn how to fight for your marriage the right way. It is a gradual process, but eventually God’s grace will restore and heal your marriage. Even in the most desperate situations, you will see God’s hands working in your marriage.

Must read ( How To Fix A Broken Marriage 10 Major Advice Every Couple Needs)

What if you are The Only One Holding on?

I need you to know that you are not alone and there are a lot of ministry options that can help you out. I urge you to completely surrender yourself, your spouse and your marriage to God.

He has promised that all things will work together for your good and no matter what happens, you will grow from this situation.

You should know that the scripture does not promise or guarantee that following these guidelines will save your marriage. God will not make your spouse stay, because your spouse has freedom to choose. Have a little hope and faith in God.

 

When you surrender to God, you are giving your marriage the opportunity to get better. God will touch the heart of your spouse and turn things around in your marriage.

 

Available Help

God is your only help and he should be your source of peace, strength, confidence, shelter and counsel. He will satisfy your every need, but you must be willing to spend time with him. You should be with God in prayer and study His word.

God’s grace and love for you is ever sufficient and ever sure. Draw closer to Him and see His glory.

In order to deal with your emotional needs, you require professional or pastoral counseling. Whichever you choose, make sure they are interested in restoration of your marriage and centered on God’s plan for a covenant marriage.

 

Books and Classes

Separation does not necessarily lead to divorce. The “Divorce Care” ministry can help if you are going through unwanted divorce or separation. You could locate a class around you or check the internet. Sometimes, couples receive the help they require to restore their marriages through these classes. Click Here To see

 

There are also a couple of Christian ministries and blogs on the internet that will be useful. You could check the library or a local bookstore. A few recommended books include:

  1. Save The Marriage System” by Dr. Lee Baucom (Click Here)
  2. Save Your Christian Marriage” by Dr. Lee Baucom  (Click Here)
  3. His Secret Obsession” By James Bauer (Click Here)
  4. What Men Secretly Want” By James Bauer (Click Here)
  5. Revive Her Drive” By Tim and Susan Bratton (Click Here)

 

Here are a few tips that will help teach valuable principles for going through this type of trial in marriage.

 

  • Pray

Praying is necessary and I’m sure you already pray as much as you can even in terrible situations.  Sometimes, words cannot fully express how deeply hurt you are by the situation.

Everything seems so unfair and you are too weak to even tell God how you really feel. But it is okay to cast all your fears and burdens onto him.

Remember that you are a warrior and a conqueror, not a victim. Be a warrior in prayer and ask God to open the ears, eyes and heart of your spouse. Pray that God will heal them and bring them nearer to His word.

Ask God to also give you the wisdom and patience to move forward. Ask Him to mold you into who He needs you to be.

 

  • Believe

You need to have hope and believe God for a restored marriage. Hope will be the fuel to keep you pushing forward. Even if your spouse feels like the marriage is over, hope will give you strength to keep fighting.

 

  • Look attractive

I’m not asking you to compare yourself to anyone else or compete with anyone. This is simply encouraging you to be the best version of yourself.

Attract your spouse by keeping an attractive physical appearance. Be attractive both on the inside and outside.

Your spouse should know your value and understand that they have a lot to lose by letting go.

 

  • Let them go

You do not have to hold your spouse captive to win at love. Do not let your spouse feel caged. Open the door and set them free. It may sound scary.

Why are you letting them go when all you want is for them to stay? You must remember that the only love worth having is love that is freely given.

 

  • Move on up

When your spouse leaves the marriage, it is because they want space and time away from you. The last thing you want to do is try to bridge the gap because it is clearly not what they want. Just be aware not to push them further away.

Create your own space and move in a forward direction that will show you that you can live without your spouse. This will create more space between you two and your spouse will reconsider the choices they made if they have any reservations about it.

They will feel the space increasing and come back to you in order to fill it.

 

  • Stand your ground

Let your spouse know that you are still holding on to your marriage and that you want it to be restored. Let them know you are willing to do the work and obtain required help in order to rebuild the relationship.

Read: (10 Signs Of True Love From A Man That Guarantees Your Peace Of Mind)

 

  • Avoid naivety

Do not allow your spouse to walk in and out of your life as they choose. Be careful not to allow your spouse sit on the fence.

Although, you want to make the best of every opportunity, you cannot afford to be a doormat. A counselor would be able to advice you best on this.

Cling unto the Lord and remain faithful to Him and your spouse. God will see you through.

Monalisa Dario

Writer, Relationship Review Analyst. Couples Relationship Psychologist, Business person. Wife and a Mother of 3 lovely Children..

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